Monday, September 26, 2005


In the end
All we've got
Are the rules
We choose to play by

I choose Love no matter what the Truth. I choose to look you all in the eye as I drip with knowledge and still smile right back. I choose to talk straight and do so in the Light of Day. I choose to meet you in the Field of Battle and throw roses at you, perhaps a fart bomb if the whim takes me. I choose to stick to a religion of my own making, whereby I will Perceive and Investigate, and I will Understand and Laugh It Off. I will do my fucking damndest to hold my knowledge sacred and never mount a High Horse, though fuck me...look out when I'm pissed. I've been known to get a little Dark. And I will write strange blog posts and forever strive for language and meaning far beyond my capacity, but well within reach.

Fear? I know not fear. There are only moments of confusion.

Everything I have feared this past year has come to pass, and yet here I sit smiling. For Hunter was right. There is no fear, only confusion. Confusion, Mr Frank Herbert, is the mind killer, not fear. Lately, I have watched confusion all around me. People circling themselves and each other, blinded and hooded and unwilling, unable to breath, slow the play, take stock, exhale confusion. And armed with anthropological curiousity I have taken my own lessons from this and found my own way through and you know what? There is no confusion really either, not once you look around at what is REAL. Brains are powerful and dangerous things. But they are not hearts, they just wish they were and act accordingly.

The only things that really matter in a hotel are privacy, fresh oysters and a telephone.

Stop what you are doing please. Find yourself a sanctuary where you no longer know anything but your own needs. Just for a little while. Don't do anything rash. Pick up the phone, order some oysters and allow yourself a little fucking luxury and a truck-fuck-load of privacy. Now believe whatever it is you want to believe, but calculate Fact vs. Fiction vs. Daydreaming vs. Hope. Have some more oysters and get pissed. Wait for the brick to hit you, then open the door to the outside world.

The too much fun club is back in business. Let us rumble.

Let the light settle. Remember that no matter what, Freedom comes first. Then happiness. But let us quantify freedom for a moment then we can start on the shots. Freedom is not, "I do what I want!" Freedom is being able to stand alone or together or in a group of people and never have to worry about the Weight. Whether it is introspection or dealing with another, Freedom allows you to be one hundred percent READY. You are ready. Freedom means you do not carry in your heart, a knot, a hole, a hurt. For if you do, then how will we be able to laugh freely together at the bar? How will you be able to look me in the eye? Freedom is not Anarchy, taking what you think is yours for you are free and Fuck The World, Fuck The Rules. Freedom means, no lies, only truth. That my fellow troubled souls, is motherfucking liberating. THEN comes happiness.

*pours shot*

*opens door*

*smiles at Life*


  1. "Freedom is not anarchy"-- good point. Who ever said that shots don't lead to wisdom was wrong. The fuckers. It's good to know that your good times are up and running again.


  2. 4. rumble with the too much fun club, YES PLEASE.
    i do a lot of smiling at life. but have a little brain trouble. trouble eh. where does it get ya?

    brain damage.