Sunday, December 10, 2006

And the hours go like minutes, and the shadows come to stay.

There is Hell in the sky as I walk the streets toward tonight. Thick choking dust and fire painting the setting sun blood red and lending the whole picture a surreal tint. If this is my reality, then I have brought Hell to life this weekend. The sky is so low that when I hold my arms up I can pluck clouds from the sky, and recreate them, darker, denser, with a simple exhale from my cigarette. People run across the streets holding clothes over their mouths, as though this will save them from ingesting my Hell. I simply breathe it all in. I suck Hell deep into my lungs and the burning needles hot searing ash gives me an impersonal determination. It's a serial killer kind of detachment, as I watch the whole world burn. I have created this tableau, not the fires. I have brought Hell to us, for it is time, time to judge, time to surrender, time to change, time to make everything final. And then I'm hit with a Revelation. And it just so happens, that it's six o clock. Six past.

Night comes, but offers little respite.

I don't mind, I didn't expect any.

********

Back in my cave all hot molten lava chic, I discover my things have been rifled through. Twice. In the space of two weeks. By two different people. People who say they love me but don't trust me and decide to take it upon themselves to find out what truths lie within my shadow black soul. Of course, they find nothing but pain. Their own. I shake my head and walk back outside to watch the fire flies dance around the rotting remains of the past. My skin crawls and I read the message which burns branding across my arm, TOXIC...

The message fades and I think, it's not toxic, it's just what they all call Love.

It's complicoxic.

********

I have half a chance of escape. But I have to be mindful of deception. Here in Hell a staircase leading up just as often leads to another drop. But it's a chance, an opportunity, and I'm going to do all I can. Every minute of every day right now, I keep my mind on that escape. Some people might call it running. But if you were in Hell, wouldn't you run?

3 comments:

  1. 'Complicoxic'? You said a mouthful, boy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AND...


    You were branded by Britney? tOXIC



    Of so little consequence. Ash and burning. We're all ants. Under an indifferent glass.

    ReplyDelete
  3. i was in hell too on that fiery day. i shouldn't have taken the dog for a walk. my lungs burned.

    stay safe.

    ReplyDelete