Sunday, February 11, 2007

Gimme that ole fashioned Morphine.

The sun is clear and bright as I walk alone through the hundreds and thousand thousands of people on the foreshore. I knew it would be like this, it's not really my thing, but I have a car and an itch and so I make my way here anyway. On the wind, pounding techno competes with latino beats and Ween. It's a musical mish mash brothers and sisters, can't you fell the bringingness together? Bleaugh.

I'm meant to visit my prospective employers down by a stage they're running in Catani Gardens, I stroll over and watch the Catwalk Show they've got going on and listen to "da na nana na na da na nana na na I like the waaaay you moooove..." People are dancing around me, there are too many people with dreadlocks. I can't find the people who I have never met to talk to anyway, so I keep walking.

I find my DJ friend behind the decks in a converted shipping container. The smile I wear when I see him is my favourite smile, it's a real one. I feel happy every time I see him, though we never have much to say, just random catch up talk. It's nice to just be in the same space as him, I think he feels the same. I like that sort of comfort.

He gives me some mdma. I put my sunglasses on, and we make our way down to the Vineyard which is filled with coked up musclemen and ladies in short skirts wearing no underwear. The mdma feels good. The people, good looking as they are, are ugly and sweaty, but I let myself have a good time anyway. And one of the ladies with no underwear is quite keen on showing the world her waxedness as often as possible. I leave my sunglasses on. The mdma feels good.

I hang out with a guy who works at the advertising agency I've been working at. we're probably a little out of place, but it's good, and it feels good. I buy two long necks, Coopers Green, and we sit on a couch drinking beer with the afternoon sun keeping us warm and watch the play of light on sweat on skin.

"da nana na na..."

********

In the movie Heat, Robert De Niro has a line, he says,"I am alone, but I am not lonely" I've been thinking about that. I'm certainly not alone, and I don't feel lonely, but at the same time, I still find it difficult to feel at home anywhere, with anyone. I understand the things that people say, and the things that they care about and talk about, but my mind is always somewhere else, and I can't remember the last time I felt present and engaged in a deep and meaningful conversation. I hope that doesn't mean I'm arrogant or ditzy, I just very rarely feel drawn into something. I think what it is, is that I feel like my path leads somewhere different than the people I talk to, and I'm impatient to get on with it. Maybe I should just chill the fuck out, and appreciate things more. But I can't help it, I'm always looking at the horizon, and wondering what's to come. Weird. Blah blah.

********

In the last week before New Year's I was walking along the street when one of those floating little seed pods came dancing toward me mid flight. I've always had it in my head that they contain a wish, must be a childhood memory. So I caught it, and made a wish. It was a pretty boring wish, as far as wishes go, it had to do with working and money and being a normal person after a year and a bit of emotional and financial chaos. The thing is, it's seemed to come true, slowly but surely. It feels so different, stability. So different. The only down side is, I don't feel particularly creative, I feel more concerned with pragmatism and practicality. I guess nothing is forever, so I'll just be patient and see what eventuates. I've got to rewrite my book, and get it to an agent, I've been told. So, I'll wait until the angst returns in secret, and wake up at 4am to do some soul searching and writing. It's always the best time to write, when your only company is a cigarette, a glass of wine and the sounds of the night outside your window.

In the meantime, I'm always looking out for more wishes as I walk the streets.

********

Do you wanna have some interactive dance fun with me? You see, I'm hoping to save some bucks over the next few months so I can hop on a plane and see some sights in far flung places. I have some locations in mind, and there is a small interpretive dance jig that goes with it. If you, sitting there at your computer, are silly enough to do it with me 1) it'll make me very happy, and 2) maybe it'll send us all some good travel vibes.

Okay.

You need to be geographically correct when you do it so...

Make two fists.

Work out on an imaginary map in the air in front of you where San Francisco is, and where New York is.

Now say them out loud...San Francisco, New York as you use your fists in the air pointing

(OKAY I KNOW THIS IS WEIRD AND DUMB BUT SHUT UP)

...as you use your fists pointing to where they are...then...and this is the fun bit...

when you've got one fist on SF and the other on NY, bring your arms together to make an M shape and say "MIAMI!"

So, San Francisco, New York, Miami. San Francisco, New York, Miami. San Francisco, New York, Miami.

You can make up a melody as you please, but I think the Snoop Dogg style works best with these words.

Sigh.

Bye for now, I have a car, some money and a week off, so the country is looking gooood.

1 comment:

  1. San Francisco... NEW YORK... Miami; San Fran, NEW YORK, Miami... It has a nice ring to it.

    ReplyDelete