Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Goodbye Babylon.

He's out there and I let him go.

That's what the police must think, when it goes bad and he goes free and they've got nothing and at night they lie back and their nightmare is a smile - a simple smile - an insane victory, one for the bad guys.

He's out there and I let him go.

But it's diferent for me, see. This cold case, these memories of ice, this frozen fear. This wasteland I've walked for ten years in the hope of finding light, in the belief that I could run from the darkness, flee the terrible terror of responsibility - it's not my fault - in the hope that I could cower from thoughts that inaction is biblical in its reward. Babylon for the meek, let it go, let it go and one day you will find where to go - you didn't kill her, you were far away, unable to even say goodbye, you still looked him in the eye. You even took the handful of gold. You fuck. You weak fuck.

And now he's out there and I let him go and they're asking me where, where he might be and I just don't know, I don't know, I don't want to know.

I never wanted to be a man, when they came knocking. I still don't, the only time I do, is when there's no fucking hope.

When everyone has given up on me. That's when I feel strong, that's when the music comes and the words too and that's when the fire is lit,when I'm down below feeling the heat and furnace of desperation and loneliness. That's when I'm ready, but not now, not now.

But okay, you're right. He's out there and I let him go, so okay, okay, let's find the fuck and I'll let him know. I'll take the stand and I'll say the words and maybe, just maybe, this time they'll be heard and it's too late for me though, isn't it?

It's never too late, mister. It's never too late to pay or repent and if you pay a price it's worth every cent - because you, boy, you can take it, on the chin, under the eyes, the wrinkles and scars and running and lies, it's all caught up and he needs to pay and we need YOU to stand up and say,

that fucker, that fucker is a murdering bastard and I will never forgive him, and I will never tell myself again that she loved him and their love was a nightmare for them both.

Not when she is dead and he is out there.

Not when he is out there and you let him go.

No comments:

Post a Comment